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Where you stand is rarely the whole ground
Layers of problem-solving When it comes to the layers of problem-solving, there’s the thing. And then there’s the other thing. There’s what meets the eye and the support. The object and the intention. What’s known and everything else. Your voice…and the reason you open your mouth. Both co-exist and yet most of us often only consider one level. This is normal; we’re looking at the level that meets the senses. Unfortunately, our senses neither fully address the scope of problems nor the shape of solutions. How Small Issues Become Big Problems Over Time Here’s an example: a leak in my kitchen destroyed the floor. Flooring, I learned, is much more…
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Anger, my dog of war
What my dog taught me about anger I struggle with anger. Or that’s the story I tell myself. For those of you into Astrology, I have a lot of Aries in my chart. For those of you not into Astrology, when I get mad, I get really mad. It’s palpable. My wife once told me that my anger can fill a room. Admittedly, I don’t hide it well. Some might call this being hot tempered. Others might call this a problem. In the past, my anger has cost me friends, relationships, and opportunities. Hence why I think I struggle. Today, however, I’m befriending my dog of war. Because anger isn’t…
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Distance running with my selves
Lace up your best long distance running shoes Now that it’s spring, I’m running outside. I love running. It’s my favorite. When I was a kid, my favorite sport was soccer because it covered the most ground. At the time, running felt like flying. It was otherworldly. In a sprint, I could move beyond myself. Today, my sense of “self” and moving beyond it are quite different. Running is less about flying and more about ghostbusting (another childhood favorite). Yet while I’d like to think, “I ain’t afraid of no ghosts,” sometimes, sadly, I run with them. The fact is, humans are multidimensional. So multidimensional that from a Dynamic Systems…
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From repetition to expertise
The art of effective learning strategies to master anything new Repeat after me: when it comes to effective learning strategies, repetition is crucial. Exposure, on the other hand, is necessary but insufficient. Though helpful, exposure must be repeated and repeated at intervals. So at the risk of overstating, effective learning starts with reps. From Outliers, Gladwell posits 10,000 hours to greatness. Greatness, of course, may or may not be your goal. Maybe you just want to learn something new. Or maybe you simply want to be more effective. In any case, time invested is critical. You know this intuitively, but researchers suggest that doing something more than once improves your…
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No one’s been here that long
A mindfulness-for-anxiety perspective shift in modern life I’ve never done this before. Not just this writing. I mean this moment in time. And if I’ve never done this moment before, then (I imagine) neither have you. In fact, no one has. As far as I can tell. At the time of this writing, the oldest person alive was less than 117 years old. In the U.S., those over 100 account for about .03% of the population (though this number is on the rise). Globally, those over 100 account for about .01% (though this number is on the rise, also). Even with more centenarians alive today, that’s not a lot of…
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The calm before the story
The power of storytelling Everything is a story. The “self” is a story. The past, the world, thinking, the internet, and even your family are all stories, also. Some stories are more concrete. Others theoretical. Some stories span the test of time. Others ephemeral. You get the idea. The point is this: the capacity for storytelling makes us human. (Second source: Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari. Are you familiar? More on this later…). In fact, it’s this power of storytelling that enable humans to work together (again, see Harari). It’s also this capacity for storytelling that enables us to think in terms of “us vs. them.”…
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The world as a stage
Platform Thinking in Work and Life: How to See the Structure and Leverage It The object of work is no longer just production (though it could be). The object of work isn’t just prestige (though it could be, also). And the object of work isn’t just money (though it’s very important). Rather the object of work is what production, prestige, and money can do within the structure. And the structure is a platform. Work, Life, and the Platform Mindset Platforms are everywhere. Yet I suspect people misunderstand them. People say, “This is my platform,” or “I’m growing a platform.” But what’s missing is the idea that most platforms aren’t an individual’s object (with…
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The gift of grief
Lessons from Grief: What My Mother’s Death Helped Me Understand About Living Just over two years ago, my mom died. Hard to believe it’s been that long. If you’d like, you can read more about it here. And yet, on the anniversary of her passing, I found myself feeling…good. Though odd, this seemed positive. Acceptance, of course, is the final stage of grief (but grief is neither resolute nor conclusive). Yet for me, acceptance wasn’t just about my mom’s death; it was about my life. Since her passing, I find myself saying more and more: “I’m so happy to be here.” Why this matters: it’s easy to be negative. In fact, it’s…
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Why I replaced my morning meditation for anxiety with this one breathing technique…
The only morning meditation for anxiety you need In my mid twenties, I started meditating. I started a morning meditation for anxiety to calm down. I needed to quiet my mind, and I’d heard from several sources that meditation helps. “Sign me up!” I thought. “Where do I start?” But before I squeaked out my first om, anxiety wreaked havoc on my wellbeing. I lived with roommates, barely made enough to pay rent, and was socially isolated, bouncing from one unimpressive temp job to another. When I wasn’t working, I obsessed over unhealthy relationships and struggled to find self worth as an actor. Defining self worth through any job or…
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Dream interpretation – why I record, consider, and analyze my dreams
What I think I know about dreams (so far) For the past five years, I’ve been exploring dreams. In fact, I saw a Jungian Psychoanalyst before and after my mom’s death. Perhaps it was intuition. On some level, my body knew that a major life event was occurring. For those who don’t know, Jungian Therapy, like Freudian analysis, includes analyzing dreams. If dream interpretation sounds a little out there, that’s because it is; why we dream is ultimately unknown. Nonetheless, I remain faithful to dreams, recording them, considering them, and then, perhaps most of all, analyzing them to the best of my ability. I do this because dreams offer a window…
